Sunday, October 12, 2014

Fighting For Your Life In Recovery

When someone has been addicted to alcohol or drugs for most of their lives there comes a time that many will say, "enough is enough".  This was my life while drinking and abusing alcohol for many years.

I started drinking alcohol at the age of nineteen because of something that came into my life that I felt I couldn't handle being sober, so I took up drinking thinking this would be the fix all of my problems, and was I ever wrong.

Nothing got fix, in fact with drinking and abusing this drug over the years I depended on alcohol each and everyday as a result.  As the years went by I realized, "I am an alcoholic!" I thought that just drinking to feel good would wind up me being an alcoholic in the future.

There was one thing though.  I knew deep down inside that I was addicted to alcohol, but I just never wanted to admit to others, and I in turn I really lived in denial.  I told myself, and other I could stop drinking alcohol anytime I wanted, but I knew for a fact that this addiction to alcohol got the best of me and it showed according to others that knew me, including my wife and children.

Fighting for your life in Recovery would be the next thing I would have to do, once I finally got out of the denial I lived in for so long, and decided to get and stay sober.

As you all might know, especially those alcoholics out there that are reading this, it is not a easy thing to say goodbye to the one thing you love and depend on each and everyday.

If I wanted to save my family, and in the long run, save my own life, I would have to surrender to the demons that had control of my life and the lives of my family.

On the night of October 26, 2009 I finally made up my mind to surrender once and for all to the demons of alcohol.  I sat in the garage as I usually did all alone ready to open my first of many beers for that night and all of a sudden a voice came in to my head.  That voice was the voice of God,

Many of you may not believe it, and then some of you just might.  I wrote a hub on this experience of the night of October 26th and it is titled "A Life Changing Whisper."

That was the night that changed my life.  To be able to hear the words of God in my head.  I sat with a beer in my hand not even opened yet.  I sat and listened to the words spoken to me and to tell you truth those words frightened me to death, because I knew right then that I MUST do something to change my life right that moment.

I put the beer down, that I never opened, and said to myself, "tomorrow October 27, 2009 will be the change in my life, and I will never ever pick up a alcoholic drink for the rest of my life."

October 27th is only day away as I write this and it will be 5 years clean and sober for me.  This is something I never thought I could ever do.  I thought all those years that I drank, why stop drinking now, the damage is already done with all the years I drank and abused alcohol, so why bother now was my words for many years."  I was wrong in that statement I said to myself.

So ever since that day in October of 2009 my life has changed in so many ways, but believe me it was not easy to say goodbye to my addiction, BUT I did it and so can you!

Remember, each and everyone of us only have one life to live, so why would we destroy it with an avoidable addiction to either alcohol or drugs?

I truly can't believe in a few days I will be clean and sober for 5 years! My sobriety not only changed my life, but I have changed the lives of my wife, children, families members and dear friends, and I am not talking about the so called friends I drank with because they are all out of my life ever since I stopped drinking alcohol, for we now have nothing in common.  Sad to say, But very true.

So just remember, you need to fight for your life while in recovery, because everyday there may be some type of temptation or urge to drink again.  I (we) will always be alcoholics no matter how you look at it, but we all must be stronger than the demons that once ran our lives, and other lives that we were so close to.

Be strong each and everyday of you new life. Stay clean and sober and try to help others as I do to make them understand that there is HOPE for every alcoholic and drug addict. 

If you get sober and just happen to relapse, get back up and try again until you get it right. Anything is possible in life if you truly want it bad enough and that includes a life of  long term sobriety!


Sunday, July 27, 2014

My Zazzle Store Is Starting to Earn Money

Hello everyone!  This post is much different than any of the posts I write here on The Clean Life Blog.  I am excited that my Zazzle Store is starting to Earn money.  To tell you the truth I forgot that I even had a store such as Zazzle.com.

I made up the store over a year ago and designed a few Tee shirts, hats and a couple other items.  The other day I went to my Gmail and there was a email from Zazzle.com so I clicked the link and it took me to my earning and what had been sold.

I was very surprised because as I said I forgot I even sign up in Zazzle to design item to sell in my own store called THECLEANLIFE.

I sold 4 shirts that read, "LIVING LIFE SOBER".  I was happy to see the royalty money I earned for just those 4 shirts, so I logged in and started to design more items like a made man and then sold a Long Beach Island Throw Pillow.  Zazzle is really a great site to earn money if you have a good imagination and the Knack to design different one of a kind item.

I am still trying to navigate through the site because for some reason this link does not show all 71 item I have designed.  It only shows 12 items for sale, but I will place the link right here for you to check out what I have so far, and until I get the site running right.

Thanks for reading and let me know what you think of the site so far.  There will be lots more items coming soon.  If you have any suggestions of an item you think you would like just let me know and I'll try my hardest to make it up for you.

Thank you!
Mark (The Clean Life)

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Never Lose Hope On A Life Of Sobriety

Many people that have an addiction to alcohol want in the worse way to be sober, but their addiction is holding them back from getting and staying sober. Many times the alcoholic is simply not ready for sobriety to be back in their life.  I was one of them. For many years I tried to get and stay sober with no success.

I did get sober twice in the years I drank.  The first time sobriety lasted for about a year and the second time I tried to stay sober lasted only two years until I went back to my old ways of drinking and abusing alcohol.

The reason for these two failures of trying to stay sober was that I simply wasn't ready to stop drinking and live a life with long term sobriety, BUT I never gave up hope on myself.  I knew sooner or later I would finally admit that something had to be done with my life and live with long term sobriety.

You can never lose hope on a life of sobriety.  The road to recovery is tough when you have an addiction to alcohol or any drugs for that matter, but if you continue to keep hope alive you will achieve that life you wished for.

If you truly want to change your life, and know that you indeed need to change your life, than anything is possible in life, and that includes long term sobriety.

Like I said earlier, it took me three times to get and stay sober, but I never gave up hope that one day I would finally surrender to the one thing that was running and ruining my life, and that was my addiction to alcohol.  The third time was the charm for me and I thank God each and everyday for giving me the hope, the willingness and the strength to get sober and stay sober.

You truly need to love and believe in yourself in order to have a wonderful life of sobriety.  You also need to get out of that negative mood you are in because of your addiction.  For myself, I was a very negative person and always wondered why nothing would ever work out the way I wanted it to.  Once I became sober and changed my attitude in life to nothing but positive, everything I wanted and dreamed of started to become a reality for me.

As hard as it was to finally make that life change and become sober, it was worth every bit of hard work, and my life shows it now.  I am a much happier person.  I continue to keep a positive attitude even when times are tough, and I never once reached for an alcoholic drink just because things were a little rough.

If you never give up hope, your life will indeed change as mine did.  Sometimes it may take longer than you wanted it to take, but if you continue to try your very hardest to change your life, it will happen.  Like I said before, it took three tries before I nailed sobriety and got rid of the demons that were in my life for so many years.  Three is a charm so they say!

So my advice to all those that are suffering from an addiction to drugs or alcohol is to NEVER give up hope on yourself.  Your life is so precious, and all of us were put on this Earth for a reason.  All of us should enjoy the life we were given and not destroy your one and only life with an addiction.

Lets everyone try our very hardest to make that change, and take Massive Action in order to make that change.  Some of us may have to stay distant from our friends that we drank with in order to keep that temptation and urge to drink again from coming over us.  As for myself, I did just that, and in the long run I lost many friends because now we had nothing in common such as drinking and getting drunk with each other.

It seemed like they all ran away because my life was now much different than their life was. I was sober and they still had their demons running their lives. I never preached to them about sobriety, although they saw that I was a new man because of my sobriety.  My hope is for one day they see the light as I did back in 2009.

NOW LET ME TELL YOU WHAT THINGS HAVE CHANGED IN MY LIFE BECAUSE I NEVER GAVE UP HOPE!


  • Even though I had lost many friends because of my sobriety, I gained many new sober friends in the end. Great sober friends are really awesome.  To be able to speak a conversation with out blurring your words, and to not get in any drunken fights because the alcohol is altering your thinking and acting is a wonderful thing.
  • Back when I drank and abused alcohol my relationship with my wife and children started to decline, although we still loved each other very much, it still wasn't the same when I drank.  Today, now being sober the relationship with my wife and children are unbelievable.  It is so amazing how being sober and happy can change so many lives that are in your life.  People now are excited to be in my company and I get along with each and everyone of them.  No one wants to be around a drunk person unless that person is also drunk. Misery loves company so they say, and believe me I was very miserable when I drank.
  • When I had a couple of drinks there were many people that stood and talked to me at parties or other occasions, BUT after those couple of drinks as I continue on my way to getting drunk I started to feel the effects of the alcohol and then people would shy away from me because they knew what the future hours would bring as far as my continuing to drink. Now being sober I still go to those parties and occasions, but without a drink in my hand and still have those conversations that last the complete night without anyone walking away because of me getting too drunk. Sober conversations are always the best believe me.
  • I truly believe, and I hope that I am a service to many people that read my articles here on my blog and on so many other websites.  I write just about everyday regarding alcohol addiction and ways that I have found that helped me get and stay sober since October of 2009. Writing has been my life since 2009 when I got sober.  Each article I write gives me more hope knowing that maybe one of these articles will touch someones life and will help them to understand that having an addiction of any sort is not the end of their life.  Never give up hope on your new life.  All of you that have an addiction have the chance to make that life change.  The only thing you have to do is to want your life back no matter what it takes to get it back.
  • Writing about my alcohol addiction experience indeed helps me to stay sober each day.  Some may wonder how writing keeps me sober and my answer is... as I write, I think about the way my life was years ago when I abused alcohol, and then I think as I write, how many people I maybe helping that have been suffering with their addiction as I was for so many years.  It brings me great joy and happiness to know I may help someone in the world, even if it is only one person. 
I pray for all those that are suffering with an addiction, and hope everyone can get clean and sober and live that one and only life they have with happiness, contentment, love and sobriety. 






Monday, March 10, 2014

Why Do So Many People Abuse Alcohol?

Here is a question for us all of us that drink and abuse alcohol.  "Why do so many people abuse alcohol?"

These are my thoughts, and my experiences of why I drank and abused alcohol, and maybe some of my thoughts here may reflect on your life as a person that abuses alcohol to the extent of being addicted to it.
  • I thought that drinking and abusing alcohol would solve any problem I might of had at that moment and beyond.
  • I thought that more people would take a liking to me because I was cool and drank alcohol.
  • I felt as if I could really speak my mind more openly without being nervous when speaking.
  • I thought that I knew all the answers to everything when I drank.
  • I thought that I was a fun person when I drank and acted like a fool.
The fact is that I just loved the feeling that alcohol gave me.  When I first tried alcohol at a very age it was just out of curiosity and a experiment with the guys.  That curiosity and so called experiment turned into an addiction to alcohol.  I couldn't live a day without it as the years went by and was so used to having the buzz that alcohol gave me, it turned out to be a huge part of my everyday living.

I didn't mean to get addicted to alcohol.  I didn't wake up one day and say, "I want to be an alcoholic."  This goes for anyone that has an addiction of any sorts.

I never knew by drinking alcohol as just an experiment with my friends would turn out to be a horrible addiction to it.  This crap we call alcohol, if we are not careful will take hold of your body and soul and then watch out, because once those demons get hold of you it will be hard to get rid of them.  It took years and years to get my demons off my shoulders.

PLEASE don't let alcohol get the best of you because we all know that once addicted your life will slowly change for the worse.  You will begin to loss everything one by one as I came so close to doing until I finally had the strength and willpower to say NO MORE and finally surrendered to my inner demons.  

I have to tell you that by quitting drinking has changed my life completely around all for the better.  If I knew, in which deep down I did know, I would of stopped drinking alcohol years ago, but that is the past and now I am working on my recovery and my long term sobriety and know I am beating the demons inside of me each and everyday.

Don't let alcohol ruin your life and the lives of all the people that are in your life.  Be strong and have the willingness and desire to change your life as I did.

If I could do this and get sober so can anyone that has an addiction to alcohol.  Keep that positive attitude in your life every single day and believe if you want sobriety back into your life than it will happen just like it happened to me.

Don't get me wrong, I am not against having a couple of social drinks with family and friends, BUT if you can not control your drinking and drink responsibly then you should consider not drinking at all.  That was the huge problem I had.  I could not just have one or two drinks and call it a day.  It was never enough alcohol for me once I got started drinking. I needed to feel that buzz my body longed for each and everyday. If you feel you can not get sober on your own then PLEASE ask for the help you need to help you get sober and live that beautiful life of sobriety!

You can read more of my articles written on HubPages on addictions, sobriety, positive attitudes, Jersey Shore Living and much more right HERE.
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Saturday, March 8, 2014

How Remembering Your Past Alcohol Addiction Helps With Your Recovery And Long Term Sobriety

This has helped me in many ways over the past years of my sobriety.  How remembering your past alcohol addiction helps with your recovery and long term sobriety.

I have been sober since October 27, 2009, and I must say it has been a journey to say the least. Many times during those years of recovery the urge and temptation to drink alcohol again came over more than I can say.

Once the urge or temptation came on me I admittedly thought of my past drinking days and what I did to myself and those that loved and cared for me. I remembered the wrong things I said, and the wrong things I did.  By thinking of my past addiction, and the things I did and said put a stop to the urge and temptation to drink alcohol again.

I knew and learned over the years that drinking alcohol solved nothing, and in fact only made things worse.  I drank alcohol all those years thinking that whatever was wrong in my life it would just go away by drinking and abusing alcohol.

If you are in recovery and those temptations and urges come over you, like they do me, just remember those bad days of your addiction and hopefully that reminder of those days will put a stop to picking up that drink of alcohol.  It really works for me and I truly think it will work for you, BUT you have to be stronger than that temptation and those urges to drink.

Another thing that pops into my mind when that urge to drink comes over me is all the years I have been sober and if I were to touch that drop of alcohol all those years would be in vein,, meaning I would have to start at day one in my sobriety and that is something you or I would never want to happen!

So, this is what really helps me to stay clean and sober, and hopefully this will help you to remain sober when that temptation or urge to drink comes over you.

Granted, I am sure that urge will come over you, more than once during your recovery, as it does me, but if you think of what your past was while drinking and abusing alcohol, and give that urge some time to pass, you will be just fine.  Just do yourself a favor and never give in to the demons that will always be inside our bodies. You must be much stronger than them, and if you keep that positive attitude and stay strong (you and I will be just fine!)

God Bless all those that have made it to sobriety and have had the strength to surrender to their inner demons, and God Bless all those that are still coping with their addiction to alcohol, but never fear, with the right frame of mind, having a positive attitude and having the willingness to stop drinking forever, all will be fine for you.  

It is not the end of the world because you have an addiction, but it could be if you don't change your life around for the better.  

I DID IT AND SO CAN YOU!






Wednesday, February 5, 2014

I Quit Drinking Alcohol So Now What?

So I quit drinking alcohol so now what is the question I asked myself, and I am sure many people that have quit drinking have asked the same question to themselves.

Now what?  Well you are about to start and new and joyous life, BUT you have to stick to your guns and never let those alcohol demons back into your life.  This is where it gets hard for many alcoholics after they have stopped drinking alcohol.

They are bored.  They don't know what to do with themselves because they were so used to having a drink in hand and being in bars and pubs drinking them up with their drinking buddies.  At least this was the life I had, and I am not speaking for anyone else, but I am sure those that have this addiction to alcohol understand exactly what I am talking about.

WHAT IS NEXT YOU MIGHT ASK?

  • You quit drinking, and you are now sober, and the next step is to stay sober.
  • You  can now enjoy your life sober and start spending quality time with your loved ones that maybe you never did when addicted to alcohol.
  • You will be able to start saving money that you were spending on alcohol and not on your families.
  • You can now see for your eyes how you are starting to change not only physically, but mentally.
  • You can start living the life you so well deserve.
  • You need to stay away from things, places and people that will tempt you to start drinking again.
  • There will be so many things will be able to do now being sober, such as getting behind the wheel of you automobile without any worries of getting into an accident because of being drunk, being pulled over and getting that DUI. 
  • YOU WILL BE FREE!
Granted, there will be days in the beginning, and even far into sobriety, but you can not give in no matter what it takes to say NO!

I have had many times in my recovery that I just wanted to throw in the towel and take a drink. Why?
The reason was maybe that day something went wrong in my life or something just didn't work out like I'd planed it to.  I stood my grounds to my demons and say NO I can not do this!

Back in October of 2009 I made a promise to myself that no matter what happens in my life, good or bad I will never pick up an alcoholic drink again, and I am a man of my word and would never break a promise especially to myself.  Sure it was hard to say NO I can't do this, but as the minutes passed by that urge and temptation to drink passed.  I knew if I gave it some time that feeling and urge to drink would go away, and it did.

You have to be a strong person and much stronger than your inner demons.  The demons are waiting for you and I to mess up and start drinking again.  This way if you and I do drink alcohol again our demons will have full control of our lives once more, but this time if we break and drink it will be harder to get rid of this demons that are out to kill us.
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So get sober, stay sober, and start to live the clean life like I have since 2009 and will continue for many years to come.

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

How Having A Positive Attitude Can Change So Many Things In Life

For someone like myself, living with an alcohol addiction for so many years, I didn't know the words, "Positive Attitude."

I lived each day with a negative attitude, and feeling sorry for myself because I knew deep inside that I had an addiction to alcohol, but I just didn't want to do anything to change my life. Now being sober, I know how having a positive attitude can change so many things in life.

There is nothing worse than thinking and acting negative.  You will never get anywhere in life with that kind of attitude. It took many years for me to get straightened out in my life, and once I did, Positivity took over, and life looked so much different with my new attitude, not only towards myself, but life itself.

Here are just a few things that changed in my life once I got clean and sober and began thinking and acting with a positive attitude.


  • My entire married life my wife's and my dream was to live by the Ocean, but no matter how hard I tried to make that dream into a reality, nothing worked out.  I truly believe that my addiction to alcohol held me back in so many ways, along with my negativity that came with my addiction.
I got clean and sober in October of 2009, and everything began to work out, and the reason that is, and my beliefs are, that I was not willing to help myself before, and when things didn't work out as I wanted them to, I just drank more figuring alcohol was the fix all. I am now writing this down the street from the Ocean. My dream has now become a reality!

  • My marriage and family life was falling to pieces slow, but sure. 
Now sober, I couldn't ask for a better family life and marriage. My best friend, and also my wife stood by my side through thick and thin when I was addicted to alcohol, and now I am proud to say I have sobriety, and we live with nothing but positivity in our lives.  I now realize that your attitude in life can change so many things, for the good or for the bad.

Our attitudes can make or break our lives, so get out of the negative world and start living with that Positive Attitude.  You will be amazed of how your life will change, just by you changing your life, and your attitude towards life.